*It’s only fair that you know, as I am writing this, I am eating blue tortilla chips. So happy birthday to you or me?
Gargi.
Yes friends, my older sister’s name is Gargi. A name I cherish, cry to, hold on to, hate saying goodbye to. My oldest sister, I have a few older sister but this one is my OLDEST. No, not old, don’t think old. Think wise, my wisest sister. I have a few wise sisters, but this is my WISEST. February 4th 1991. What a day. The day was probably filled with sunshine the minute her lungs filled with air, and Satan quaked in his boots. *that’s me assuming satan wears boots or shoes for that matter. Needless to say the world changed the day my GarnerLeigh was born. Now here is the question I’m sure all of you are asking. “How do you know, you weren’t even considered yet. Third in line for being next. ” Oh, trust me friends, I know.
Strength worn in a smile, feet that do not waver and hands full of grace. A beautiful combination of a women I long to be, strive to be. Growing up, *not that I’m nearly done* I have always wanted to be GarnerLeigh. To me, she has this unattainable factor that most people never even catch a glimpse of. Seeing a purely beautiful soul is rare, but being related to one has been one of my greatest joys. And I mean pure not in the way of sinlessness but in that even her filthiest of intentions seem to be merely misunderstandings. She lives a life wrapped in selflessness and pursues the hearts of all surrounding her. Always smelling of blue perfume she leaves everything that she touches slightly more intact than she found it. Whether that be hearts or bodies, her contact is magical. She doesn’t know what it means to do something halfway, even if her eyes are heavy and soul downtrodden she is going to give everything that she has. Something I admire most. She walked ahead as the first born, to catch all the scares, the fights, the rules, the misunderstandings and the “hard being a kid”-ings, allowing her four come along behind, shielded just so. Protection is a gift that she gives without effort and something no one questions. She has taught me in the way that she lives, in that following the rules gains respect but knowing when to break them allows for a life lived. She knows what heartbreak looks and feels like but more importantly understands how to find joy even in the dark. She is what has kept me going all this time and I believe I don’t thank her enough. She taught me to hate airports when Nashville would come calling, but to love milkduds more when she returned to the couch snuggled up tight. She reminds me that Jesus ultimately has control so seeking it is fruitless while allowing me the freedom to make my own decisions. She helped me learn that loving my body is more important than fitting into jeans that are not that cute anyway. Also showing me that sleeping in sometimes is more important that going on a run. Not that she doesn’t prove that running a million miles a day is possible because she does that too. Even strength in her stride, she is the definition of not giving up. She encourages with her eyes and prevents judgement from leaving her lips. She the greatest sister, greatest friend and my greatest example.
When I was a kid and I was scared or lonely or couldn’t sleep I always knew that her door was open. She would talk with me, calm me down, pray with me, snuggle me and sometimes read to me. I like to give her credit for my love of reading because in those quiet hours of the night when my many anxious thoughts flooded my head, it was her gentle voice bringing me back to peace. One of my favorite books that she read to me was the Treasure Tree (*not trying to copyright .. not sure what I say to be correct… don’t sue me) It is a book about four characters going on the journey of life and throughout the different tales the personalities of the animals are revealed. My two favorites, The Lion and The Golden Retriever, remind me of my wisest sister. This is how they are described; The Lion is daring and unafraid in new situations, likes to be a leader and take charge without being bossy, ready to take on any kind of challenge. He is firm and serious about what is expected and makes decisions quickly. The Golden Retriever is always loyal and faithful to friends, listens carefully and likes helping others while feeling sad when they are hurt. She is a peacemaker and doesn’t like when others argue. She is patient and willing to wait for something. Never have I heard a more accurate description of the beautiful contradiction that she is. Brave and humble, strong yet faithful, Daring and willing.
GL,
I remember the day that I got your car, now one of my most favorite things. Getting pearl wasn’t cool in that she is a beautiful car (*which she most definitely is) I was over the moon because she was YOURS. Most of my life that I can recall I have wanted to be exactly like you. In how you dress, what you like, how to respond to situations and most importantly who you are. I’m starting to sounds slightly creepy but regardless still to this day, as a 19-year-old–who-doesnt-know-what-she-is-doing, I still want to be like you. You inspire the best parts of me to be better and love on the worst parts even when its impossible. *I promise it can be*. You are welcoming and inclusive, daring and protective, strong and gentle, someone who admits they don’t have it all together and tries better when days are hard. You make the sun shine a little brighter and bring peace to my heart knowing you are on my side, ALWAYS. Jesus reveals Himself from your pores and you make me believe in the good. Proving that hard work always pays off and when it doesn’t there is always something to learn. Never doubt your ability to love because you have helped create me into who I am today. You are one of my favorites. Thank you for all of the joy that you have brought to this world and especially me. Cheers to 25
-ah
be still 